could things get worse?

well.. i hope things are getting better for everyone of us..
why he act as if he doesn't even care about me? haihs.. most of the time message also he's like so pissed.. i think i should stop texting him.. maybe he's sick of me texting him everytime? i dunno already.. so confused about everything.. i wish someone could lecture me.. every principles of life that i should know.. not sitting here sighing and knowing exactly nothing.. i just wish that i could read people's mind.. seriously.. it's so hard to be someone else's friend. what does it takes to be a good friend? friend as in many ways.. friends 'friend' or family's friend.. or love friend.. ahh~ i don't think anyone would understand what am i talking about.. crapness*
nevermind that.. all these while i've been trying so hard.. to be better.. but i guess.. i should have let him have more freedom ler.. *i know u are going to say i am making more assumptions* =]
hmmm~ lets see.. went to school today.. i-lyn, guat phing, ze yin and kim mei went to KL already.. and quite a number of students are absent.. so the class is kinda empty.. tomorrow gonna go to either gurney or queensbay with pei ying and cynthia.. as we are the 'kuai' ones staying in penang.. xD and i am so gonna fail add maths again in my next test!! if i don't buckle up now.. i am doomed.. =( sad rightt?? i am so stupid! lol..

some people just don't appreciate what they're having in their life ya know? for instance, parents whom are too controlling?? try to be in their shoes before saying it le k.. i mean, they care for us thats why they're concerning about us rightt. or else, why they even bother to care? too free ah you think? hell, no. there are even parents more strict than your own ones k.. so stop complaining and and all u freaking care is your THE ONE. hmm. i don't mean to say it's wrong u know? just that, dunno la.. how the heart feels and how the brain thinks of it. lol
balance is the best.. hehe..

14 days more to go..should i be happy? sad? nervous? scared? i have no idea.. maybe its a bad idea after all.. maybe he hopes that that day won't come? is he excited??? *no idea* assumptions.again. oh well.. tata`

Amazed-Trademark

Everytime our eyes meet
This feeling inside me
Is almost more than I can take
Baby when you touch me
I can feel how much you love me
And it just blows me away
I've never been this close to anyone or anything
I can hear your thoughts
I can see your dreams

Chorus:
I don't know how you do what you do
I'm so in love with you, it just keeps getting better
I wanna spend the rest of my life with you by my side
Forever and ever
Every little thing that you do
Baby I'm amazed by you

The smell of your skin
The taste of your kiss
The way you whisper in the dark (ooh yeah)
Your hair all around me, baby you surround me
You touch everyplace in my heart
Oh it feels like the first time everytime
I wanna spend the whole night in your eyes

Chorus

I'm amazed by you, yeah

I don't know how you do what you do
I'm so in love with you, it just keeps getting better
I wanna spend the rest of my life with you by my side
Forever and ever
[Repeat]

Every little thing that you do
Every little thing that you do

Baby, I'm amazed by you

it's hard to forget someone u love.. yet u know u cant be with them.. why don't u pray? maybe some day she would change her mind le? dun sad de yea.. u know who u are.. =]
i'll still be here for you no matter what.. and i don't hate u ..lolx x]]

songs!

yeahh.. today i am just gonna express my feelings out through these amazing songs.. =]

Bryan Adams-Please Forgive Me

still feels like our first night together
feels like the first kiss and it's gettin' better baby
No one can better this
still holdin' on, you're still the one
first time our eyes met -  the same feeling I get
Only feels much stronger - I wanna love you longer
You still turn the fire on…
So if you're feelin' lonely don't
You're the only one I ever want
I only wanna make it good
So if I love ya a little more than I should

Please forgive me - I know not what I do
Please forgive me - I can't stop loving you
Don't deny me - this pain I'm going through
Please forgive me - if I need ya like I do
Please believe me - every word I say is true
Please forgive me - I can't stop loving you

Still feels like our best times are together
Feels like the first touch
We're still gettin' closer baby
Can't get close enough
I'm still holdin' on - you're still number one
I remember the smell of your skin
I remember everything
I remember all your moves - I remember you yeah
I remember the night - you know I still do
So if you're feelin' lonely don't
You're the only one I ever want
I only wanna make it good
So if I love you a little more than I should

Please forgive me - I know not what I do
Please forgive me - I can't stop loving you
Don't deny me - this pain I'm going through
Please forgive me - if I need ya like I do
Oh believe me - every word I say is true
Please forgive me - I can't stop loving you

One thing I'm sure of - is the way we make love
The one thing I depend on
Is for us to stay strong
With every word and every breath I'm prayin'
That's why I'm sayin'…

Please forgive me - I know not what I do
Please forgive me - I can't stop loving you
Don't deny me - this pain I'm going through
Please forgive me - if I need you like I do
Babe believe me-every word i say is true
Please forgive me - If I can´t stop loving you
Never leave me-I don't know what I do
Please forgive me- I Can´t stop loving you

Can't stop loving you

april fool!

yeah.. today is april fool.. not so fun also eh this year's april fool.. i didnt fool anyone i think.. see i am sooo angelic? =p
in school, yeogeash did something to mr.lee and he almost gave her a 9 dimerits! just a very small incident nia.. okay, here goes;
yeogeash: sir, your shoelace is untied la sir.
sir: *looked down*
yeogeash: april fool!
sir: i wasn't looking at my shoe, i was looking at the floor. =.='

so stupid right? haha.. and and.. we all thought yeogeash gave him the envelope! that one maybe la.. 9 dimerits only make sense.. hehe..

this sunday went to 'cheng beng'.. the weather is so 'cold' man.. i wonder why people wanna follow the crowd all go at the same time till traffic jam.. and its not fun at all.. =( but what to do.. its good.. haha.. my uncle gave me angpao somemore k.. so its good.. =p

i want to talk about this. though its real sensitive.. but oh well..
see, some people just don't get it u see.. they just think that whatever they're doing is right. well, different people have different points of view.. that i agree.. but sometimes, they would just judge things without even knowing the root to it. and sometimes people have a different point of view of 'backstabbing' too.. to me, its just, talking behind some one else's back without their knowledge and gang up with those whom hate them and fucking shooting that particular person with god knows what kinda usage of words used. sometimes people saying things behind some one else's back but it isnt call backstabbing.. well.. to me only maybe.. its like, maybe yeah saying bad things but its not practically didn't care for that person's feeling k.. its like, agreeing with someone else's that its a negative attitude for one to do so.. so people would just want that him/her to understand it and make it as a life lesson.. learn from it than just whooping around thinking negatively; he/she backstabbed me! oh i freaking hate that bitch! he/she is effin two-faced. something like that.. maybe this thing is sensitive thats why nobody is willing to speak out the truth. to that person they're talking about. it's not that easy k.. it might hurt one's feeling and this can leads to arguements.. like what i said earlier in my earlier post if u ever read. hmm~ worse still, arguements are still ok.. what if fights? and and here goes the 'i don't need a friend like u anymore!' that sort of thing.. yeah.. why am i saying this?? it's because i admit i might be a bad person doing it.. i admit.. so what?? like what the hell?? who doesn't? don't freakin' act as innocent and angelic as u are and then not thinking of how would other's feel when U say about that particular person?? come on.. feelings do tell.. if u don't like this feeling, then stop doing it to others. thats what i gotta say.. hope that its not too harsh nor offensive.. this doesn't mean i am hating those who do this to me.. i never hate these people.. its because, we're all humans.. we can't help feeling this way right?? so think about it. and i am saying because i care.. if not, why would i waste my time even bother talking about it?? caring for it?? i rather use my time go and do something else right?? like chit chatting..gossipping.. etc etc.. thats all i can say ler.. if u people still don't get it then u can come to me personally.. i won't offend u seriously.. someone has to do it somehow.. or as i say, it will lead to arguements, etc... and by that time, its too late.. but its never to late to be sorry.. anyways, i dont seems to bother so much now.. i am also used to it already.. i wonder why some people just like to act in front of other people just because u want to get attention; or or make that someone likes u.. its so damn unnatural.. but if thats the way u are then i cant shut up.. but its not.. people do change i know.. i guess i just need to get used to it and accept it as a part of life! =]

today has been kinda bad.. and i salute myself for it.. haha! first time didn't message 'him' the whole day.. its really hard though but i want to see if he would even think to message me? its weird huh how things come and go sometimes.. when u have it, u don't care to say hi. but when u lose it.. its hard to say goodbye.. thats life.. haha.. so many principles in life man.. i am learning.. u are learning.. everyone is learning.. so its ok for us to make mistakes sometimes.. we just ought to learn from it.. and i am willing to forgive anyone now.. haha.. cause it seems like nothing to me ler.. unless u really do something that i cannot obviously forgive.. then its biggie.. =p
18th of april faster come! =] <3>

Mariah Carey-I Still Believe

You look in my eyes
And I get emotional inside
I know it's crazy
But you still can touch my heart
And after all this time
You'd think that I
Wouldn't feel the same
But time melts into nothing
And nothing's changed

CHORUS:
I still believe
Someday you and me
Will find ourselves in love again
I have a dream
Someday you and me
Will find ourselves in love again

Each day of my life
I'm filled with all the joy I could find
You know that I
I'm not the desperate type
If theres one spark of hope
Left in my grasp
I'll be holding it with both hands
It's worth the risk of burning
To have a second chance

No, no, no, no, no, no
I need you baby
I still believe that we can be together
If we believe that true love never has to end
Then we must know that we will love again

CHORUS (x2)
I still believe
Someday you and me
Will find ourselves in love again
I had a dream
Someday you and me
Will find ourselves in love again

and by the way ze, although i like emo rated songs, i am not as emo as u are! =p

this seriously gotta stop. or else my mind is gonna blow. yeahh.. i actually being a stalker! and i tried to stop stalking people.. but i just cant.. i told ze that i am one.. cause she said she is stalking people pulak.. but then, i cant help being one.. just too curious.. yet i wished i dint stalk in the first place.. seeing things that are hurtful and reading things that are hurtful is just so...........*speechless* sigh~ pictures do mean more than a thousand words.. its really true..i 100% agrees with it.. sometimes even words kills! plus pictures? like what the hell? haihs... nevermind that already. i've had it. sighness....


nothing much happened these few days.. i guess thats all for now.. reading people's blog can actually know that person more ya know.. its like, can know more things ler.. but sometimes not so clear.. at least better than not saying out mer.. its really suffering keeping everything inside.. please learn to say out.. maybe not to me.. but to anyone u feel like telling.. =]
or or doing something that can release your tension k.. go outing and etc.. i see something earlier.. some words that kills.. and i dont even know that particular person.. weird eh? but that person wrote something that has gotta do with some person i care about.. haha.. humans.. oh well.. nothing already i guess.. tata for now.. =]

babyface-everytime i close my eyes

Girl, it's been a long, long time comin', yes it has
But I, I know that it's been worth the wait, yeah
It feels like springtime in winter
It feels like Christmas in June
It feels like heaven has opened up its gates for me and you

(Chorus)
Every time I close my eyes
I thank the Lord that I've got you
And you've got me too
And every time I think of it
I pinch myself 'cos I don't believe it's true
That someone like you loves me too

Girl, I think that you're truly somethin', yes you are
And you're every bit of a dream come true, yes you are
With you baby, it never rains and it's no wonder
Sun always shines when I'm near you
It's just a blessing that I have found somebody like you

(Chorus)

To think of all the nights I've cried myself to sleep
You really ought to know how much you mean to me
It's only right that you'll be in my life
Right here with me, oh baby, baby, yeah

(Chorus)

its true my friend.

yup. its true alright. ze yin said something about communication.. the words spoken.. its very true.. i 100% agree with it.. people just don't realise it.. u know? its like.. somebody is saying about something and another person walked by and over heard the conversation and curious to know about it but then they're all like so secretive and act like nothing ever happened at all. damn. that hurts. and also, when someone is kinda down and all, someone else would just come by and say something which is really rude and didnt even think of that particular person's feelings.. u might hurt someone k.. why people just dont realise it? well, i dont blame those who dont. just saying whatever u want and dont care about other's feelings is like....poking a needle into their heart?? or worse still, stabbing it with a sharp knife... wont be so terrible kua.. hmmm~
and and, when that someone just shout at u or being rude to u, u would definitely feel hurt right? no matter u're in a good mood or what.. but still.. caring for others means alot to them. especially when that person is somebody close to you.. or or u care for them alot and etc... i can cry right at that moment wan k.. but of course wouldnt la.. its so embarrassing! keeping inside and let it all out at night lo.. its the best way.. i obviously dont want my mom to find out about anything anymore.. but that time i really cant stand it anymore.. i got slapped and hit and everything.. it hurts too when someone u love doing this to u yet they dont understand what u are feeling deep inside but just knowing how to put all the blame on you and thinking that they are right and not thinking at ur point of view.. its so sad u know?
so some advice to people reading this, would u please think of other's feelings before saying something or doing something? be more thoughtful as they will repay the same to u.. god bless..=]

still waiting for his message.. he said he would message me after off-lining.. but still.. none.. =(
its been an hour already.. its okay la.. maybe he is resting already? must think positive! ^^ i love u.
some people said there are girls chasing after him. is that true?? but i have faith in him. he will stand a chance.. at least one.. i know u still care.. =] <3

-nights-