initiative

sometimes, people tend to have no guts to do something.. or express their feelings to someone.. whom they love for years.. et cetera.. well, why shouldn't they? i mean, it's no use keeping your feelings to yourself right? but there's still risk and circumstances to be reconsider.. not all confession will be successful though. but if u never try, u never know right?? that's the thing.. but sometimes u are not tough enough to face the challenge.. so what are we to do? we can't practically pleased everyone right?? and even if we do, we will only end up hurting ourselves unknowingly.. tell it to a trusted friend would help a lot. but some people prefer to keep it to themselves. so, it depends on the individual.. just how do we overcome the problem.. hmmm~ feelings are the things that we human cannot control. so it's really tough for everyone of us.. no matter what it is, we still need to face them and live like normal days.. sigh~ a moment ago, i was feeling down.. real down.. and we all know what is the thing or who is the one that can only cheer us up.. bring us back to life again, do we? but what if this is one of the things that can't be fulfilled? are we just gonna end up suiciding?? or or crying?? or what...? i don't know. do u?? what i know is, i am a negative thinking kind of person.. i would do stupid things at times. so it's no biggie for me to see these things.. and i had weird weird dreams.. and the dream that i dreamed has something to do with the thing i am going through.. it's so cool right?? how powerful our mind is?? it can even control u when you're asleep! they just don't let u go.. then u ended up perspiring when you're awake due to the nightmare u just had. it's not a good feeling.. it is definitely not. out of a sudden i just want to go to some place calm.. away from this crazy place.. i just want to be alone.. for a moment.. but not forever.. i never wanna be alone forever.. it's scary.. just some time alone would be great.. free from this hectic place a bit.. unlike just now, i wasn't myself.. feeling so down, useless, stupid, pathetic, a burden to people around u.. et cetera.. but then again, when u are feeling like this, usually, people, would definitely think of negative thoughts about themselves, don't they?? but think again, there's another part of u hidden inside u can be real good.. real sweet.. real decent.. =] so, when u're at ur worst, think of the wonderful things about urself.. u can feel pretty good.. i know i am just good at saying things but real bad at doing it.. well, at least try. even if i can't, u people should try.. seriously.. don't be like me.. =] that's all for now i guess.. ----