my first life story! xD

well, this is it i guess.. the blog of mine that can be viewed by people! xD
ahh~ so many things to say.. but where to start?? hmmm~
start with school today.. hehe.. during moral, we learned about 'kasih sayang' le..
cool right? i mean, our teacher ask, what is the difference between 'cinta' and 'sayang' ?
i know what is the difference but how to explain it? hmmm~
then my thoughts was changed from the question marks to him. yes. him. u guys that dunno me that well must be curious who is him anyway? he is a very special person to me.. though i knew him for less than a year, but he means alot to me.. i guess i must be more understanding, more mature, tolerate more, be more patient etc.. i dint know i was THAT bad till 'hole' told me.. another mysterious person eh? xD
i felt so guilty thinking of the way i treated him.. i want to turn back the clock.. and wish i appreciate him more back then.. but.. do i have a chance?? i don't want to bother him now.. so i guess i will only talk about it to him after his major exam.. so now i wish him all the best.. and pray for him every night.. thats the least i could do.. i wish he knew.. how i feel for him still.. no change in me.. hmmm~ i wrote a little something earlier.. it might be bad but.....oh well... i'm just gonna typed it out.. x]]

Day after day
as time pass away,
Is our love fading away?
Please don't ask IF it's fading away,
Cause my answer would definitely be NO WAY..
Now what I can do is to only pray
Pray and ask God for the upcoming day
Dear, please let my dream come true..
As you're the only one could make it come true..
As I will wait for the upcoming day! x]

What if tomorrow never comes?
Will u be by my side??
You said when you're about to die,
You hoped that I am the one holding your hand and dies..
What if I never get to see you again?
Would you come by and say your goodbye?
Or would you just walk away without looking back?
Would u come see me if I'm sick?
If yes, I would never wanna recover..
Would you call up when I need you?
If yes, I would hold onto my phone 24/7
I can't imagine my life without you..
All I want to say is, i miss you babe..

how was it how was it?? xD
i seriously missed him.. i regretted for all that I've done.. so now hoped that everything would be okay after his exam.. i wish he knew.. i changed alot de.. after all this.. i really do.. ><
today, in school.. she did it again! hurt my feelings abit.. i wonder why some people just would change just because to please their best friend.. i am not being specific here k.. just that i want to sound out how i feel.. sigh~ forget about that.. really sensitive issue here! heh.
i truly appreciate all my friends around.. no matter what wrong they've done.. or i've done.. we'll always learn to forgive and forget.. that is what i am so glad about us.. although we arent like one whole big gang anymore.. we still communicate well.. still strong with it.. just sometimes maybe some of us will feel left out or abandoned or something.. i feel bad for some of my friends whom felt it.. although they dint say it out, i can obviously see it through their expressions.. and maybe the other friend doing the wrong thing but they just dont realise it.. its okay though.. cause we always forgive and forget.. x]
sometimes when we feel like saying it out to them, we dunno how to sound out.. and even if we do.. both parties would be sad.. or even worse, leads to arguements! this is what i am afraid of most.. and then.. everyone would stop talking to each other de.. this is SAD..haihs..
anyway, here's another lousy poem.. xD

u might kick me in the ass
u might slap me on the face
u might shout til i cry
u might shoot me with your words
u might curse me to your heart
u might abandoned me all alone
u might ignore all my concern
u might be rude to me
u might even make me cry
u might blame me for certain matter
u might not care about me
u might never even call when you're far
u might messed up my most important date
u might hurt my feelings
u might backstabb me
u might hate me tonight
u might forget me tomorrow
no matter what it is
let's just learn to forgive and forget
or we all may live with regret.

love u all my dear friends! x]]