hey people! I'm back. haha. lazy to blog these few days. hehe.
the reason i blog today is cos I'm too bored and too free. yup.
firstly. i also wanted to write about my resolutions. not resolutions actually.
it's more to like, things I wanna achieve.

1. first of all, I wanna make sure my brother gets 5 A's in his UPSR. yes. weird I know. and the best of all, ME, his sister, is gonna make sure he achieved that. seriously. I already bought him books to do and books to read and taught him, give him tutorials. haha. I hope that I can keep going because u know I do things halfway always. and I wanna change that negative part of me and be a better person through that. experiences. =)

2. second of all, I wanna learn driving. haha. I know, many people did already. nvm ma I have I-Lyn to accompany me. hehe. the reason I need to drive is because I can go to elsewhere with a lot more ease and I don't have to ma huan my dear. hehe. nad my parents too. and not to forget, my grandparents too.

3. third of all, I need to figure out what is it that I want to pursue in. Til now, still have doubts. I'm so gonna die.. march is like so near... chinese new year is so near too. then those 'sam ku' aunty aunty sure ask, eh what u wanna study ar.. etc etc. i hate it. and then go ask my parents too. like to compete. I dont like to compete. u guys know right? oh, talk about competing. i had bad memories. someone accused me of competing when i dint! i hate people to accuse me of doing something which i dint. why must people guess about negativity? why isn't there any positivity? and i dont like to explain things. u wanna think that way, then fine. i dont usually 'simpan dendam'. but some things that is too hurtful. better keep quiet. it's been 2-3 years already anyway.

4. I wanna learn mandarin and take up music lessons. but yeah, I dont have the time. its sad kay.. I wanna learn them so badly. I dunno why but since I was a little girl I like music more than arts. arts are ok i guess. just that I dunno how to appreciate them. no matter how people said that's a beautiful/an ugly painting, all i see is a painting. sorry but i dont know. but i really love to travel and visit art gallery. its nice to see different thigns once in a while. oh and i loveee taking pictures. hehe. and i wanna learn mandarin. I'm a Chinese! haha.

5. I wanna think twice before I make a move. I've learned how important it is to do that because once u have done something u might regret, then u already loose. u loose a chance to do it again. there is no guarantees that u will feel it again.

6. I wanna spend more time with my family. I wanna spend more time with my friends. who knows what will happen later on? who knows I might leave them? who knows they might leave me? I can't take goodbyes very well. but if I knew I had precious moments with them, then I would heal faster. I wanna learn not to hate. as the saying goes, Life is too short to hate. its true. and hating is very tiring. and it takes up my evergy. I get moody and I get frustrated and I eat. a lot. haha. yeah I do.

7. I wanna make peace with the people I messed up with. that takes a lot of effort, patience and guts. Sorry if I hurt anybody. I meant no harm. and to Cyn, u mean no harm I know. I forgive u. =) btw, why do u want my latest picture? I havent send it to you.

8. I wanna be independent. because I know that whenever u're an 18 year old, that means u have to 'berdiri di atas kaki sendiri' already. then there's this working thing and studying thing. and I'm still lost. people scolded me that I am immature. and I dont like it. but now I know. they are right after all. because I really am immature. I still dont know how many things work. the other day when my mom was talking about house loan and installments and etc. and damn i only understand like 40% of it. it's so sad isn't it? I mean. the lawyers, agreements and stuff. I partially understood though. so obviously the curious kid here shoot them with lots of questions and they got frustrated with me as they never get to discuss things! oh boy, I can be really noisy k.

9. The truth always hurt. so I learn to forget. forgiving is the best way too. so learning to forgive always!

-----will be continued-----